A Necessary Redefinition of Responsibility and Leadership

As children we were often spoken to from those on-high about responsibility and leadership; the discussion was not meant to be fulfilling or fun.

Here’s a story to help you view these concepts differently.

It was a pleasant April morning in Tuscaloosa, Alabama when the first tornado sirens began to wail.

Mary and Stan, two of my colleagues and former residents of the town, had driven to set up an art show at the local Bama Theater. Heading out early to prep the exhibit, they thought little of the alerts, as the sky was clear and there was no visible danger. They finished hanging their work around noon and noted the clouds beginning to mount outside; they returned to their hotel for lunch just as the rain began.

By six that evening, three separate EF4 tornados left a swath of devastation over a mile wide and 80 miles long that cut through the heart of the city. When all was clear, Mary and Stan took to the streets with 15 small water bottles they raided from a vending machine and a travel first aid kit.

The rubble and gnarled scraps of steel left in the cyclones’ wakes made the town unrecognizable, alien even to those who had spent their lives there. Navigating debris-filled roads in their van, they found themselves knocking on the doors of the neighborhood where they once lived.

With each house they visited, Mary and Stan heard new stories of survival and perseverance. As they approached each door with a loving ear and a grateful human embrace, they found each person taking steps back to their own humanity, finding relief from the immediate trauma.

While my colleagues had not planned to be in a position of healing, they found themselves in a place of leadership and service. In the Co-Active model, a leader is one who takes responsibility for her world. In this way, each and every one of us becomes a leader. Stan and Mary’s experience of seeing a need and filling it simply on their own volition is what Co-Active Leadership calls “leading from the field”.

In the Co-Active model, a leader is one who takes responsibility for her world

Redefining Responsibility

While that’s great for Mary and Stan, the question is where, and how, do you embrace your leadership?

Remember when our parents talked down to us about responsibility? We had to put our fun activities away and, instead, be “responsible.” In this old model, responsibility became an obligation, an unwanted duty filled with guilt and even resentment.

Sadly, for many people this thinking carries over into adulthood, impacting families and workspaces. We can get stuck in titles, roles, and statuses that limit our full resourcefulness under the guise of an outdated concept of responsibility. And many times it’s our un-belief in ourselves, forged by these same outdated perspectives, that gets in the way of where we’re being called.

After years of carrying these burdensome obligations, how connected are we to what brings a sense of fulfillment and meaning to our lives?

What if responsibility was free from these old trappings and, instead of weighing us down, allowed us to express the whole of who we are?

As Co-Active leaders, we acknowledge the skills and talents we have and use them to benefit the community. Co-Active Leadership starts from within: understanding who you are, the passions that inspire you, and the gifts you possess. This shifts responsibility to respond-ability; knowing you have the capacity to respond to situations as they arise in your personal and professional life. It then becomes a matter of choice to decide when and how to use that knowledge to act within a given situation.

What if responsibility was free from these old trappings and, instead of weighing us down, allowed us to express the whole of who we are?

Leadership calls us to offer something freely, even if it fails, and to let go of the need for all the answers. It’s about understanding one’s impact and honoring the human connection. It asks us to see past personal or one-sided desires to build alignment among all parties for the sake of mutual benefit, individual respect, and continued growth of the community.

From this perspective, leadership becomes a gift to offer our personal and professional world.

The Angles of Leadership

When we think about leadership, often we have a misconception that leaders are loud, vivacious go-getters promoting their vision and gathering support around them to move their vision forward. Yes, that’s an important piece to recognize. But the ability to lead from the front is only one aspect of leadership.

Some of the most important leadership moments come from those who are able to identify their partners and give them the opportunity to step into their own leadership. They drive the vision forward and take responsibility for their own piece, no matter how large or small their piece may be.

Identifying key stakes for individuals and teams that unites the diverse values and perspectives with the greater vision, keeps the organization moving in an aligned purpose. In the Co-Active Model of Leadership, we look at how leading in different angles provides a holistic way of leadership that benefits in the organization or community.

For example, a leader of a conference sees the purpose of the conference. He then forms a committee to lead with him in designing the curriculum, identifying speakers and executing tasks to make the conference run smoothly.

During the conference, however, this leader steps back to allow speakers to shine, adding their own vision and purpose to enhance the participant’s experience. In addition, participants come together in dialogue and discussion to add their own perspectives.

Leaders know when to let go and empower others to step up, creating a dynamic inter-play that values each person’s insights and abilities. This ability to let go comes from knowing your core, and is essential to leadership in any form.

Leaders know when to let go and empower others to step up

If you don’t know who you are and what you stand for, it becomes easy to get stuck in the others’ artificial perceptions, swaying between the latest fads. Acknowledging your values, strengths, and places of vulnerability provides a flexibility of stepping in and out at opportune points in time.

Each member of the company or organization has an essential internal value that, when shared with others, illuminates the global vision. Leaders intrinsically know when to lead from the front, carrying the vision forward in bold action, when and how to partner from beside in the dynamic interplay of co-creation, and when to give others the space to step forward.

In this way, leading becomes a constantly changing act of service and an opportunity to offer whatever is needed from a place of generosity and heart.

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